Eat, Pray, Eat

By Julie Tatios

It’s a little blurry thinking back to April 2017, which is no surprise because my mind was so sick back then. I always tried to tell people that I felt different. I often told them, “I can’t focus. I can’t make hard and fast decisions about simple things.”

Deciding what I would eat, what errand I would run first, or when to make a simple phone call was a challenge —a challenge that often involved a lot of fear and anxiety. 

I struggled getting out of bed in the morning no matter how early I went to sleep, and I would self-medicate with caffeinated drinks and sugars to improve my mood, focus, and attention. Leaving for work without at least two 16 oz cans with 160 mg of caffeine each was a must, and if I didn’t have them I would fear the day entirely. 

There was a time last year when getting out of bed before 10:30 a.m. was a challenge, and in order to feel “normal” I had to drink a medium Pepsi and a high-carb breakfast to start my day. If I didn’t start my day that way, feelings of depression and confusion ruled over me. 

That is until April 2017, on Easter Sunday, when I walked outside to my backyard alone. It was a beautiful, sunny afternoon, and I sat right behind our old springhouse, on a dirty, broken picnic table. I tilted my head to the sky and started talking. I started to pray, and my request consisted of one thing in particular: healing. It went something like this:

“God, help me heal. Please, help me heal. Help my mind function the way You created it to function. You’ve made me to be brilliant, and the brilliance is masked by something, Lord. My mind and body are sick, and I’ve tried for so long to fix it; but, Lord, you know. You must know exactly how to heal it.”

Tears streamed down my face with exhaustion. I was 25 at the time, and my mental and physical health had taken me to a place of deep sadness and frustration. I remember struggling with the same things as a 15-year-old girl. It was all bottled up inside of me, and I was hiding it from everyone. I was tired of managing the symptoms and spending so much time, energy, and resource on it all. I wanted to live fully and freely, not limited by my current condition.

I knew my God had more for me.

The next morning, the Holy Spirit answered my prayer. He whispered the word “gluten” to my heart. It was right as I was opening my eyes in the morning that I recognized the thought having been placed into my mind. My spirit was excited to listen and to obey. 

From that day forward, I eliminated wheat, barley, and rye from my diet. Not because a magazine told me to do so, but because my Father in heaven wanted to show me something. He wanted to reveal something specific to my life, to my body, and to my circumstance. 

Matthew 8:2-3 reads, “A man with leprosy came and knelt before him and said, ‘Lord, if you are willing, you can make me clean.’ Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. ‘I am willing,’ he said. ‘Be clean!’ Immediately he was cleansed of his leprosy.” If He could heal then, I knew He could now.

After only a few days of eliminating gluten from my diet, I started to feel like myself. I started to uncover the girl that had been hidden deep beneath all the prior hurt and confusion. My body had more energy, and my mind had more clarity. 

My skin was healed of unsightly breakouts, and it felt smooth for the first time in 10 years. After a month or so, I was no longer dependent on the supplements and caffeinated drinks. I was dependent on the Word of God that started my day each morning. 

I was able to wake up as early as 6:30 a.m. naturally, without an alarm, to be with my Jesus and to hear His words and to meditate on His scripture.

John 15:7-8 says, “If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.” I asked God if He would heal me, and He answered. I can’t put into words how thankful I am for His provision and healing in this area of my life. After He spoke that revelation to me, it started a tidal wave of further healing within my mind, body, and spirit. 

Gluten was eliminated from my diet first, caffeine was second, and I’m still in the process of eliminating processed sugar. I’ve been getting glimpses of His glorious plans for my life and for my mind, and I am so looking forward to what He has destined for me. 

The enemy would love to ruin a mind like mine, but my Father in heaven loves me too much to let that happen. Psalm 139:13-14 tells us, “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”

Yes, I know that full well.